bargain shopper

I went back to hicksville for the weekend. The visit was rather uneventful, as I stayed in even when I knew a good number of my old friends were also in the area. Therefore, the most exciting moment of my weekend occurred in the checkout at Kohls department store.
After a few weeks of laundry, I noticed it would be beneficial to add more underroos to my collection. I've noticed in the past that underwear tends to be freakishly expensive for something you put on your rear end. Consequently, I was prepared to cringe as I handed over my debit card once the ideal underpants had been found. I strolled the undie aisles in frustration. I found granny-panties here and skanky floss there. That's when I saw it, the clearance rack. I am a huge fan of clearance racks, so you can imagine my excitement. The sign read, "Take 50% off already reduced prices." I browsed, trying not to get my hopes up. I was ecstatic as I walked away from the rack carrying two fabulous pairs of underwear and a fabulous pink bra. The original total would have been roughly $45. At the checkout, my grand total was $3.68!!!, even less than I had estimated. Who else can say that they have ever purchased three perfect undergarments for under four dollars? No one I tell you, no one.
Unfortunately, the rest of my shopping day was not nearly as successful.