bf

unreliable. you're unreliable.
make up your mind. i thought i was indecisive.
don't base major decisions on where your boyfriend is.
seriously.
think about how your choices affect other people.
seriously.
don't say things with a certainty if you are not certain.
when you make up your mind, stick with it.
stop feeling sorry for yourself.
stop making excuses.
don't assume that others don't mind waiting for you.
don't assume that others don't have choices to make that depend greatly on your choice.
don't assume that what you want you will get.
don't assume life is easy.
stop. listen.

be reliable. that's all i ask. be reliable. be someone i can count on.

this is not a good week for this shit. i'm stressed enough with school and everything else. i don't need this now. screw it. and we all wonder why it always appears as though i don't give a shit about anything. apathetic? yeah. but i have reasons yo. why should i care about shit if caring is just gonna smack me in the face? i'd rather not care and not have to deal with crap than care and get clobbered by it. emotionally void is what i'm becoming and i can't say it's my fault alone. i'd like to take all the blame, but that's part of what is killing me. every day lately i find myself on the verge of tears. what the hell is wrong with me? i need to be home. i need to be home. spring break cannot come soon enough.