oh snap!
Much to my delight, what I once thought to be extinct has hung on to life with a fierceness.
Remember when you were four years old and you wore those tiny, little Oshkosh B'Gosh jeans with the elastic around the back? And remember how those adorable pants had snaps on them because your chubby little fingers were still too clumsy to master the complexity of a button? It was much like having velcro on your pink, barbie shoes because you couldn't grasp the concept of the bunny ears or the loop swoop and pull. But of course you eventually graduated from the velcro and moved on to laces. You sat on your kitchen floor perfecting the skill until you were finally ready to trade in those childish, velcro, barbie shoes for something more sophisticated, like New Kids on the Block (who you only knew of because of your older, "cool" sister).
The time also came to trade in your beloved Oshkosh B'Gosh jeans. Out of no where, the day came when the elastic back was stretched to its limit. It was time to go shopping. Big kid pants don't have elastic, stretchy backs. Big kid pants don't have snaps. It was time to grow up.
Remember fumbling around with the darn things, staring at the opening of your pants with your tongue sticking out in concentration each and every time you needed to pay a visit to the little girls' room? Isn't it always a bit embarrassing when you don't return from the restroom promptly? So why did we have to do away with the snaps?
Fortunately for the lazy, the challenged, and the fat-fingered everywhere, it seems that snap pants are not only for the young after all!! I saw them the other day while I was working and was wandering around aimlessly attempting to look occupied. I was pretending to straighten pants and button buttons to make them look more appealing to the meandering customers. As I moved from one rack to the next I found myself perplexed.
"These buttons are not buttons" I said to myself. "These buttons are snaps. Holy God. These buttons are snaps on a grown person's pants. This is very exciting news."
So fret no more, my friends. If you still, after 15+ years, are not comfortable with the buttons on your pants, look harder. Snap pants are out there. Get yourself some.
Remember when you were four years old and you wore those tiny, little Oshkosh B'Gosh jeans with the elastic around the back? And remember how those adorable pants had snaps on them because your chubby little fingers were still too clumsy to master the complexity of a button? It was much like having velcro on your pink, barbie shoes because you couldn't grasp the concept of the bunny ears or the loop swoop and pull. But of course you eventually graduated from the velcro and moved on to laces. You sat on your kitchen floor perfecting the skill until you were finally ready to trade in those childish, velcro, barbie shoes for something more sophisticated, like New Kids on the Block (who you only knew of because of your older, "cool" sister).
The time also came to trade in your beloved Oshkosh B'Gosh jeans. Out of no where, the day came when the elastic back was stretched to its limit. It was time to go shopping. Big kid pants don't have elastic, stretchy backs. Big kid pants don't have snaps. It was time to grow up.
Remember fumbling around with the darn things, staring at the opening of your pants with your tongue sticking out in concentration each and every time you needed to pay a visit to the little girls' room? Isn't it always a bit embarrassing when you don't return from the restroom promptly? So why did we have to do away with the snaps?
Fortunately for the lazy, the challenged, and the fat-fingered everywhere, it seems that snap pants are not only for the young after all!! I saw them the other day while I was working and was wandering around aimlessly attempting to look occupied. I was pretending to straighten pants and button buttons to make them look more appealing to the meandering customers. As I moved from one rack to the next I found myself perplexed.
"These buttons are not buttons" I said to myself. "These buttons are snaps. Holy God. These buttons are snaps on a grown person's pants. This is very exciting news."
So fret no more, my friends. If you still, after 15+ years, are not comfortable with the buttons on your pants, look harder. Snap pants are out there. Get yourself some.
posted by that girl at
4:22 PM
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