home

I am currently home for winter break. The visit has been eventful thus far, with the holidays and other happenings keeping me busy. However, as things slow down I can see myself becoming rather bored here in hicksville until I return on the 13th.
It seems as though most of my favorite people at work have either left or are leaving shortly. This is both good and bad. First, this means that I will probably be getting a lot of hours, meaning more money and less time for boredom. Secondly, I am happy that they managed to get themselves out of there. Good for them. On the other hand, what the hell am I supposed to do there without them? Now I will find myself working with a bunch of losers that I really do not care for. That place is falling apart. At least Chris is still there.
Christmas was good, but really different. We didn't go to my gma and gpa on my dad's side, seeing as though grandpa is in the nursing home and such. And me being the huge ass I am didn't even go to the home to see him when given two opportunities to do so. Everyone else did. I suppose this makes me a terrible grandchild, but I simply do not like it there and don't know how to handle the whole situation. I not good with stuff like that.

random observation #5

If you send someone a Christmas card, they'll send you one.

Maybe next year I'll wait until the last minute to them out. Then the fools won't have a chance to send one in return. And they will feel horrible for this. whahaha... oh the Christmas Spirit!
Only Joking... I'm not really evil. I LOVE XMAS CARDS.

Break Time

-A person cannot study for prolonged periods of time without driving oneself bonkers. Ya can’t do it. Trust me.
-If you ever find yourself in the grand city of GB suffering through one of these nights of endless studying and need to get away for a bit and perhaps grab a bite to eat to rejuvenate yourself, I’d strongly advice you to stay clear of the Country Kitchen on Main. Honestly, not worth it. Not only is it outrageously overpriced for the slop they call food, the place is simply shady. Bottom line is: it’s gross. Last night I paid $8 ($10 if you include my tip) to eat the 2 pancakes that came with my other food. They were the one edible food product out of the four choices placed on our table. My poor friend’s biscuit was rock hard. I have never meant that so literally in my life.
-Instead, I’d recommend you mosey over to Perkins (IHOP is also a fine choice) and order yourself a delicious side salad and scrumptious blueberry muffin. Tonight was one of the most enjoyable and satisfying meals I’ve had in a long time. Dare I say it was perfect? I do. I DARE.
-And I do not merely say this because of the sedated feeling I’m experiencing due to the fact that my Calc III final is over and tomorrow I have zero exams.

gobs... GOBS

I hate large amounts of people.

expect more on that later... Actually, that's all.

CalCuLuS is a GrouP EfforT, Ya'LL

We learn in kindergarten to work together to accomplish our goals. It's about time we start paying attention to this. Let's get smart, people. Two heads are better than one. So, it would seem that 4 heads are better than 2.
The scarcity of time left in the semester prompted my calculus professor to make our last exam before the final a take home. Yes, this was a relief in that I wouldn't have to stress out about studying as much. However, that night I also had two major papers to finish. Time the past couple of days has been limited. I was not looking forward to the hours I would need to spend deciphering my notes, only to inevitably end up making up mathematical ludicrous.
Then my buddy whispers in my ear, revealing the plan. Of course I wanted to work on it together. The silly girl thought she had to ask. After class was completed, four of us strolled over to the library. We did work independently, only checking answers and helping one another when needed. Honestly, I think I learned a lot more this way than if I had done it myself. There's no better way to learn than explaining how to do something to someone else. And moral support is what it's all about.
Now I can stress over the final. yippy

"I don't wanna learn any more" ... yeah, me neither

ToMaTo

My Ancient Philosophy professor is this crazy intellectual man that probably has an IQ higher than anyone else I know. He went to school at the University of Chicago, or somewhere like that, where apparantly you need to be a jumbo nerd that does nothing but read to get in.
Anyway, today I went to his office to go over my paper with him. As we chatted a bit I felt my face get bright red. How embarrassing. I don't even know why. He's a super nice guy and it's not the first time I've talked to him. Perhaps I was intimidated by his intellectual superiority.
This was a rather crummy story, but I've been writing papers for days straight and am tired of putting words together. Unfortunately, I am not yet finished.

In other news... my ears hurt from the thunderous talking my roommate is doing into her phone right behind me.

interesting

You came out of the bathroom and didn't wash your hands. Now you are in the kitchen preparing food. hmmm interesting
I'm observant like that.
If only I could put more of that energy into the multiple papers I've got hovering over my head.

lingering thought #16

The World is Falling Apart Around Me

and my own pillars are leaning

WooT WooT

Ahh yes, another year has passed and I am yet another year older. Today marks the end of my teen years. I find this slightly strange. Am I suppose to act mature now or something? I gotta tell ya, I don't see that happening.
Honestly, I don't get very excited about my birthday. I'm a bigger fan of other people's birthdays. I do enjoy getting mail though. It makes me feel special. So any cause for receiving cards is a bonus.
My first plan for the evening: a Calc III take-home quiz.
WOOT WOOT!!!

UPDATE (12/10): The IHOP crew sang to me and gave me free ice cream. What an interesting evening.

in my creation

I asked for love. I received family.
I prayed for acceptance. I was granted friendship.
I yearned for guidance. I found God.
I wanted beauty. I saw reflection.
I begged for forgiveness. I was given a second chance.
I demanded justice. I accepted truth.
I requested happiness. I welcomed freedom.
I sought out success. I obtained an education.
I craved security. I was offered protection.
I desired expression. I acquired a voice.
I wished for identity. I invited individuality.
I lacked purpose. I met fate.
I ached for more. I heard encouragement.

I expected a challenge. I took a breath.

I needed help. I forgot to ask for it.

time's up

Let's face it. Sometimes classes are boring and one finds themself staring at the clock more than anything else. This is never a wise thing to do, as it makes the class appear to drag on for eternity, but it seems to be an inevitable, habitual act. No one is persistently immune to this activity. If they are, they should probably write a how-to book. It's not very encouraging to check the time only to discover that a mere 3 minutes has passed since the previous compulsive glance at the clock.
I myself often suffer from restlessness during my many boring and tiresome classes. I attempt to peek nonchalantly at my watch or take a quick gander toward the clock when the professor isn't looking. I try to be sneaky like that, so as to not give them the impression that I find their lecture any less than interesting. However, sneakiness was unnecessary yesterday during my Women in the Visual Arts course.
My painfully computer illiterate professor had been projecting the computer screen onto the wall, so that we could view some pictures on a website, using the fancy-dancy technology that she doesn't quite know how to use. Later, as she stood in front of the class speaking of nothing, the computer desktop could still be seen behind her.
At this point, my attention span had expired. I stared into nothingness as my leg began to shake and the urge to check the time arised. I looked up at the professor for some indication of whether or not she would soon be ending her useless rambling. She stepped to the left and the computer's time displayed right across her forehead. (I know there is a good word for this and how representational it was, with this being all that was on my, and many others', mind. It's killing me, but I just can't think of it.)
I'm afraid this only increased my awareness that time was moving slowly and that I couldn't wait to get out of there. On the bright side, I must have looked extremely attentive during those last five minutes.

I Hate That Word

SLOUGH

it's
enveloping
me

escape is
out of
reach

what do you call sexile without the sex?

Dearest Person I am Fortunate Enough To Share a Room With,
You and your boy have been cause for many thoughts and opinions in the past. I'm sorry I have to be the one to tell you this, but they have not been very positive thoughts. In fact, they are the kind of thoughts that produce that acidy taste deep in one's throat. Honestly, wouldn't it be rather embarrissing if the two of you caused me to rush to the bathroom with my hand over my mouth, forcing my stomach acid and recently eaten hot pocket from spewing out? Something like that could really ruin the mood, don't ya think? I do.
I was wondering, do you believe me to be an extremely heavy sleeper and that I immediately fall into this deep slumber as soon as I hit the pillow? Your actions in the past would suggest such beliefs. However, this is not true. When I am in our room and the two of you are in the living room, I can sleep quite nicely. However, contrary to what you may think, I do wake up when two people that I find repulsive enter the room. I grow ill as they lay down and I can hear their whispers. I do try to remain calm and pretend to sleep, but when all is quiet and I can hear your boy breathing, I can't take it anymore. I'm sorry. I'm just not very fond of audible breathing. Therefore, I am forced to grab my stuff and hike it to the living room.
Let me tell ya, the couch isn't the ideal place to spend the night, especially when I should have every right to sleep in the comfort of my own bed. You seem to have no respect or consideration toward other people. I have lost all respect for you a while ago. However, I remain considerate. We are adults. Let's remember that.
I could go on forever. If you'd like to hear more about the things that bother me about you, just ask. I'd be more than happy share them with you.

the list

I’m fairly positive that if Jimmy Kimmel were to ask me to be his bride I’d reply with an ecstatic, “You betcha!” I don’t know whether or not I’m alone in thinking so, but in my opinion that man is pretty sexy. Ironically, when his late-night show first aired, I assumed it to be worthless television. That is until I watched it. My, how I was wrong. Don’t we all love a sense of humor in a man? Sure, if you’re going for the late-night talk show kind of guy, Conan is also very humorous. I’m a fan. However, does Conan have that adorable little, half smile? No, but he does have weird hair. I don’t really know what it is, but I find something about him to be rather attractive, regardless of the fact he has a child only 6 years my younger. I have no problem with an older man. In fact, I prefer it. (but honestly not that old, calm down)

Perhaps I shall add him to the list of people that it is my goal in life to one day wed.
THE LIST is as follows:
Richie Sexson or Doug Davis… or any equally sexy professional baseball player
Any Hot Rock Star… we’ll have one of those very public, dysfunctional, heartbreaks of a relationship
Bob Barker… OR any really rich, hot, old man that can humor me for a while until he crokes, leaving me his fortune
(new applicant) Jimmy Kimmel... we'll laugh and make-out a lot
Josh Groban (aka- the most gorgeous and talented man alive)… He will be my final (true love) husband. He and I will grow old together and have much happiness.

UPDATE: I seem to have forgotten that I have also said that I will marry Jason Mraz. Insert him between the hot rocker and Bobby boy. Mr. AZ will console me after the prior relationship with his musical talents and mad rhymes.